I Don't Speak Hipster
by RedRadiation
Summary: Dave is the new kid in school,and a certain bitter little fuck can't take his eyes off him (Sorry,something glitched up and this got deleted! But I fixed it,and a few of the grammar errors,so it's back,enjoy!)
1. Chapter 1

You're name is Dave Strider and you're now stuck with a bunch of other teenagers waiting at a bus stop to go to a school clearly none of you want to go to. None of them seem particullary interesting to you, but that doesn't stop you from noticing the short kid who's been staring at you for the past few minutes, out of the corner of your eye. You turn to face him

Be Karkat Vantas

oh fuck oh fuck they actually fucking saw you starring you're about to flip them off when the bus pulls up and you have to get on so you don't have to fucking walk to this dumb ass excuse for a school your parents are forcing you to attend. You get on and head towards the back like you always do. You automatically spot the fuckass you call a friend and sit next to him.

"Thup KK"

He's still wearing those stupid as fuck glasses like always

"Nothing what could you even possibly imagine would be going on at the bus stop, and even if there was by some miricale something interesting going on why would I give a fuck?"

"Chill KK it wath juth a thimple quethin"

You can see the new kid from where you sit he's two rows in front of you. You think back to his appearance. He had blond almost white hair,black shades a shirt with red sleeves and a broken record in the middle,with blue jeans and red sneakers.

Be Dave Strider

You grab a seat two rows in front of the kid from before and damn is he short, Especially in comparison to his lanky friend with the blue and red glasses. You sit down and automatically put on your headphones and start blaring music drowning out your surroundings.

Be Karkat Vantas

You glance over at the new kid and have the misfortune of seeing Vriska and Eridan walk up to him. You have a bad feeling, but you're feet don't listen to your mind and within second you're blocking their path to the new kid

Be Dave Strider

You look over to see what's happening next to you and see the short kid standing in front of some prick with a purple streak in his hair and a girl with dark hair and wire rimmed glasses. And the short kid is standing right in front of your seat blocking their pa- is he trying to protect you? Despite both of them being taller and most likely stronger than him. The attempt is almost cute in a way.

Be Karkat Vantas

What the fuck were you even thinking? This kid is obviously taller he's most likely stronger too could probably handle them on his own so why did you step in? Oh well the point is you're here now might as well try to help.

"Get outta my way Vantas"

You stay put

She goes to push you but before she has the chance to the bus driver yells for you guys to sit down. So you do. Right next to the new kid.

Be Dave Strider

They get yelled at and the kid sits down in the closest seat which happens to be right next to you. You finally have a chance to get a good look at the kid. He has an over-sized black turtle neck and dark grey skinny jeans. He has his arms folded across his chest and has a frown that look like it's permently engraved into his face.

"So short stalk why'd ya try to take a bullet from my hit man."

He stares at you for a moment

"Sorry I don't speak hipster"


	2. Chapter 2

Be Karkat Vantas

The bus driver saved you from a punch to the face, but not from your own idiocy causing you to sit next to the new kid.

"So short talk why'd ya try to take a bullet from my hit man"

What the ever loving fuck does that mean?

"Sorry I don't speak Hipster."

You imagine him rolling his eyes at this but you can't tell for sure because of his fucking shades. Seriously we're on a bus why is he even wearing those? Oh shit he's talking to you. You completely missed what he just said.

"What?" You manage to choke out.

He repeats it very slow. "Why did you try to help me."

That was a good question. Why did you give a fuck about this random kid who's name you didn't even know. So you say the first thing that comes to mind

"Fuck off it's got nothing to do with you."

Be Dave Strider

His words practically come out in a growl, and now you're determined to get it out of him one way or another. You put your arms on both sides of him pinning him to the back of the seat.  
"Tell me"

A blush is instantly on his face. And god is he fucking adorable.

"I-I just don't like them it h-has n-nothing to do with y-you

"Why'd you sit next to me."

His blush just intensified 3 fold.

"I-It was the closest seat."

Satisfied with that answer you lean back freeing him as the bus pulls up to the school  
You look at you're schedual first class :Math. You'd groan if it weren't for that fact that it's be a very un-Strider like thing to do, so you just head to class silently

Be Karkat Vantas

You get off the bus quickly erasing any tratit of the blush you were almost positive you had when you Sollux jogging up to you.

"KK what the fuck?"

"What?"

He stares at you like you missed something huge. He takes off his glasses and rubs his temples revealing his blue and red eyes, something over the years you're not as surprised about seeing.

"You fucking left me to go thit with that new kid."

"Oh."

Great just what you fucking need him questioning you about this.

"I just grabbed the closest seat.." You grumble

"Bullthit"

You glare at him and find he's already staring at you.

"And just what the ever loving fuck do you mean by that!."

"What the fuck do you think I mean we both know you wouldn't even go near that new kid if you weren't at least slightly intrethted in him."

"Fuck you I am not."

The down side about knowing Sollux for years is he knows practically everything about you, and the thought that you might like that obvious asshat of a person is eating away at you. You need to change the topic and quick.

"Come on fuckass we're gonna be late for Math,I do bad enough in that class as is and I don't need to make it worse by missing half the class itself."

For once you're actually grateful to have math first thing in the morning.

Be Dave Strider

You walk into the class following a particullary plump teacher who insists on introducing you to the entire class

You walk in class has already started and you see the last bit of students scrambling to get to their classes. The teacher pushes the door open and the first thing you see tucked in the back next to the kid with the 3-D glasses is your favorite little ball of anger. You relize you never got the name and hope the teacher will say it.

"Class please welcome our new student Dave Strider."

The ball of anger is _suddenly_ intently listening very carefully.

"We'll have you sit right next to…" His eyes scan the room before resting on the last open seat in the back corner.

"Right next to Karkat Vantas"


	3. Chapter 3

Be Karkat Vantas

You freeze. There's no way he's sitting the new kid- this _Dave Strider _to you right?

Wrong.

"Karkat please raise you're hand"

And because you have to you raise one shaky hand. The next thing you know Dave Strider is sitting next to you, and the teacher has begun class.

Be Dave Strider

_Karkat Vantas? _

You're already thinking of all the ways you could make ironic nicknames from that. Karkitty as you have decidedly named him is trying desperately to look absorbed in his notes but failing miserably. When the teacher has his back turn you lean over and whisper

"Lucky for us we get to sit next to each other huh, _Karkitty" _

And now you're surpressing a laugh because he just fucking _fell _out of his chair. Causing the whole class to turn around. The teacher looks furious

"Is something wrong ?"

Be Karkat Vantas

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck this _cannot _be happening you're so shocked you can't come up with an answer luckily Sollux does so for you.

"Thorry Profther he thaw a bee"

The teacher dismissed it under things he didn't give a fuck about and went on with the lesson. Sollux gives you this look asking what's wrong you mouth that you'll tell him after class and try to actually focus on the lesson that ,luckily, goes on without a hitch

You walk out of class and Sollux catches up to you in a heart beat.

"KK what the fuck man? What wath that all about"

There's no way you'd tell him.

"Nothing I just slipped ok?" You snap at him but he's known you for so long now you doubt it'll effect him.

"Jeez KK juth wanted to know what made you fucking thwan dive to the floor."

You head to your locker your next class is History and the book is on your top shelf something Sollux had done the day before because he knew you couldn't reach it. Just your fucking luck. You stand on your toes straining to reach the top shelf you're just a bit short of it when a hand swoops in and grabs it. You turn around ready to shout.

"What the fuck! That's mi-"

You stop yourself when you see who grabbed it. If it isn't the king of assholes himself. Dave fucking Strider.

"Chill Karkitty just helpin' you out."

He goes to hand you the book and you snatch it out of his grasp

"Don't fucking call me that you prick." You snarl at him.

Not to your surprise he doesn't react. He follows you to the door of your class and you spin on your heel and glare looking up at him.

"What the fuck do you want Strider stop following me like some fucking creeper."

He tilts his head down at you although you still can't see his eyes because of his fucking shades.

"Sorry Karkitty, but it just so happens this is my class to."

He walks in right past you. You follow suit sitting in your usual spot in the back, and to you annoyance he sits next to you.

Be Dave Strider

You sit next to the short ball of anger that is Karkat Vantas. You can see him scowling the second you sit down. You look at him through your peripheral vision and thankful your shades are hiding this. You start to try and think up new ways to mess with him. The whispering in his ear already worked as did maybe you cou- your thoughts are cut short as his friend walks up and has apparently been speaking to you.

"What"

Not your best answer but whatever. The kid sighed like this happened a lot.

"I thaid thatth my theat"

You look at the kid for a moment.

"Sorry-"

You stop, what was this kids name?

"What's your name"

The kid rolls his eyes you can see him doing so from behind his 3-D glasses.

"Thollux Captor."

You're holding back a laugh trying desperately not to laugh at this kid's ridiculous lisp

"Sorry, Thollux-"

You hope that'll get a rise outta him

"but I'm sitting here today"

He glares at you obviously having heard "Thollux" before.

He looks over and points to Karkat

"But KK ith there I alwayth thit next to KK"

You just got the best idea. You pull Karkat close to you so he's right against your side

"Sorry but Karkitty belongs to me today"

Hear him screech a "What the fuck!" but stay focused on Sollux.

The guy must have caught on pretty fast because you see him smirk when he turns to his friend and says

"Oh thorry KK I didn't relize you wanted thome _alone _time with the new kid."

And with that he turns to you the smirk still on his face nods and walks to go sit on the other side of the room.


	4. Chapter 4

Be Karkat Vantas:

You want nothing more than to walk over to Sollux and scream in his face, but something is preventing you from doing that. That something being an arm. More specifically Strider's arm.

"Hey fuckass want to let me go"

It sounds more like a demand than a question and you wait for him to let you go but he instead, pulls you up onto is lap.

"What the fuck!"

You practically shriek in his ear. You try to push him away but he doesn't let you move an inch, and you can feel a blush creeping up onto your face.

"Come on Karkitty, gotta take care of what's rightfully mine."

You try to push out of his arms again but to no avail.

"Stop calling me that! And I'm not yours fuckass!"

He leans close to your face and you're pretty sure you're as red as a beet. And then he fucking smirks at you. You shove away from him as hard as you can manage and your ass collides with the floor. Ouch. You get up glaring at him and he still has the stupid fucking smirk on his face.

"Gosh Karkitty you must really like me, you can't seem to take your eyes of me.

You don't respond mainly, because you can't think of one. Dave Strider has left you Karkat Vantas absolutely speechless.

-**carcinoGeneticist began pestering twinArmageddons-**

**TG: 2o**

CG: SO WHAT?

TG: admiit iit you're totally iinto the new kid

CG: STRIDER? NO NOT A CHANCE. I AM ACTUALLY GAGGING AT THE THOUGHT

TG: pfft whatever KK we both know you want a hot piece of 2triider a22

CG: NO I CAN NOT EVEN BEGIN TO STRESS HOW WRONG YOU ARE ABOUT THIS WHOLE THING. WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THAT THOUGHT. THERE'S NO WAY I WOULD EVER WASTE MY TIME WITH THAT INSUFFERABLE PRICK. UGH

TG: 2ure whatever I 2aw the way you were looking at him

CG: YOU MEAN WITH COMPLETE AND UTTER DISGUST

TG: No liike you wanna tap that and anyone wiith eye2 can 2ee iit and that iinclude2 2trider

CG: HOW CAN YOU EVEN TELL. HE ALWAYS HAS THOSE FUCKING SHADES ON FOR ALL WE KNOW HE MIGHT NOT EVEN HAVE EYES! HE COULD JUST HAVE SOME EMPTY HOLES DRILLED INTO HIS EMPTY HEAD.

TG: KK ju2t embrace iit embrace your want for the 2triider 2uccumb to the 2triider a22

CG: NO FUCK YOU.

-**carcinoGeneticist ceased pestering twinArmageddons-**

Continue to be Karkat Vantas

You walk up to the bus stop already dreading the day. You manage to spot your fuckass-of-a-friend

"Thup KK"

"Fuck off"

"Chill have you embrathed your want for the thrider ath?"

"No because there is no want never, has been, never will"

That isn't completely true but you'll be damned if you let Sollux know that

"Well well well thpeak of the devil"

You turn to see Strider casually walking up towards the bus stop, still wearing his ridiculous as fuck shades.

"Hey thrider"

Sollux says when Dave walks up

"Hey Sollux"

He turns to you leans down so you're at the same height.

"Good morning Kitkat"

He changed the nickname today

"Fuck you Strider"

"Woah but a guy a drink first"

You flip him off as the bus pulls up and get on before Sollux. You head to the back as always and wait for Sollux to accompany you but instead he sits two rows ahead. You go to get up but something blocks your path. Strider blocks your path. He nudges you so you sit back down and then sits next to you

"Move fuckass" you growl at him desperate to get away

"Hey kitkat why so desperate to get away?"

You go to step over him but he pulls you down so you're sitting on his lap. The bus then starts to move and you've lost your chance to escape.

"Let go of me fuckass!"

You try to wiggle out of his grip but he just tightens it.

"No can do kitkat, your just so squeezable I might consider making you my personal teddy bear."

You can feel yourself blushing and despite your efforts to hide you have no doubt he sees it

"Like hell you will!"

You continue to struggle but after it becomes obvious you're not getting out you just give up.

You feel Strider nudging you

"Hey kitkat wake up were at school"

You rub your eyes an- fuck no fuck fuck fuck please tell you ,you did NOT just fall asleep on Strider. You haven't moved yet out of pure horror of your current situation so he picks you up bridal style and carries you off the bus once you get off he puts you down next to Sollux smirks at you and walks away.

"tho thtill think you're not into thrider huh?"

"Oh fuck off"

And with that you stomp off towards math class.


	5. Chapter 5

Be Dave Strider

Wow did he actually just fall asleep on you? That's kinda adorable. What? Who said that? Certainly wasn't you. Oh wow, who are you fucking kidding you'd tap that. You glance over at Karkat and he looks completely absorbed in his notes. You glance at him through your shades and like hell if you didn't see how much he tensed up the second your eyes landed on him. You lean over and breath into his ear, and this results in him letting out a very un-manly squeak. You stifle a laugh and the teacher shoots you a glare. The second the teacher looks away he flips you,and the teacher, off and you smirk. You pass a note to him.

What's wrong kitkat? A little hot air too much for you?

FUCK YOU STRIDER.

Nah,not yet.

OH MY GOD NOT LITERALLY YOU INSUFFERABLE PRICK. IT'S A GOOD THING I'M SITTING DOWN BECAUSE I LITERALLY CAN NOT STAND YOU.

Is that why you fell asleep on me Vantas?

He desperately tries to surpress a blush but fails miserably. He then crumbles up the notes and continues to shoves it into his pocket.

Your name is Dave Strider and wow do you love embarrassing Karkat Vantas.

Be Karkat

Wow you're pretty sure you will never be able to think about that without running into the danger of actually becoming a tomato. You could actually be chopped up and put into a salad right now. Sollux looks at you from the other side of you and wiggles his eye brows. You toss him a note

"PUT THOSE THE BACK DOWN"

"Chiil KK IIt ju2t 2eem2 liike you and 2triider are having a fuckiing party and ju2t leaving the re2t of u2 out here on the curb. I wanna get iin on the latest Karkat drama"

"THAT'S NOT A THING AND THERE IS NO "KARKAT DRAMA" TO GET IN ON SO FUCK OFF"

"Wanna 2hare that note KK?"

You'd deny him but that's just provoke him. You toss him the note. He responds after a few minutes.

"KK thii2 could be the next headliine II can 2ee iit now "KK and 2triider relatiion2hiip advance2" "

"HOW CAN YOU SEE ANYTHING WITH THOSE RIDICULOUS 3-D SHADES"

"2hut the fuck up KK my gla22e2 are awe2ome and you know iit"

"I AM ACTUALLY CONSIDERING PUNCHING YOU RIGHT NOW.

He tosses your note into the trash and hands the one from Strider back to you. Not that you want to keep it or anything. You totally plan to burn it later. Yeah that's it burn it. Cmon' though who are you kidding.

Your name is Karkat Vantas and you're making a fucking fool of yourself.


	6. Chapter 6

Continue to be Karkat Vantas

Strider doesn't come to school the next day. As a matter of fact he doesn't come to school for the next week, so when you see him walking towards the bus stop you're a little happy. Although you would never admit it. But somethings off as he walks up with his usual cool kid swagger. For one thing his hair is slightly ruffled and you're pretty sure everyone in the school knows how much pride Strider has in his hair, actually you're pretty sure at least half of his self esteem comes from there. The second thing is his left arm is in a cast.

You don't have time to question him about it because the bus pulls up. He doesn't sit next to you today, you keep looking at him while Sollux chatters on about some online game. You didn't even realize he was talking to you until he was waving his hand in your face.

"Hello? Earth to KK"

You look at him

"Oh my jesus fuck what do you want"

"Theriouthly you've been zoned out for the path five minutheth we're at thool KK"

Oh, look at that you are, You grumble some excuse about lack of sleep and get off the bus. You get to math class grab your usual seat and, surprise,surpise. Strider decides to sit next to you. The teacher then explains that he's broken his arm and while he is perfectly capable of handling his own book he will not be able to write and will need someone to stay after school to help with assignments. The teacher scans the room, and despite the, what you're sure is, millions of girls he decides to pick you because "You and seem like such good friends." And believe me, you fully intend to smack Sollux upside his head later for the laugh he is currently surpressing.

You go through the rest of your classes which seems far to quick, and come to the moment you have been dreading. Staying after school to help Strider.

Be Dave Strider

You are now Dave Strider and you recently broke your arm in a strife with your Bro. It wasn't on purpose or anything you guys were fighting out on the side walk and you accidently stumbled out into the street. Then a car came, a little too hard, and a little too fast. Next thing you know you woke up in a hospital with your arm in a cast and your bro with new headphones as an apology. But hell at least you get on good thing from all this. You meet Karkat in your math class right after advisory ready to take as long as possible with your homework. You stride in as your last name inplies you do.

"Hey Karkitty ready for some serious anime shit to go down. You know where they kiss in the sun set stained class room and get their happily ever after or whatever."

He rolls his eyes

"Can we just get this done so I can spend as little as time with you as possible."

"wow Karkitty that hurt. I'm wounded aren't you supposed to be like extra nice to me ya know kiss it better?"

He shoots you a glare that could make a serial killer cower in fear.

"Oh fuck you Strider"

You smirk. Too easy.

"No thanks Karkitty I don't take bottom."

He slams his head down on the desk with a force that could cause a concusion but it's not enough to hide his blush.

You two actually start working for a bit and things are going along pretty smoothly time to make your move.

Be Karkat Vantas

You've started working with Dave Strider and to your surprise he isn't a complete idiot. Actually he's pretty smart. You turn to face him when his face meets yours. More specifically when his lips meet yours. Dave Strider is kissing you and you're not going to lie it isn't unpleasant. Much to your disappointment he pulls away after a few seconds.

He raises and eyebrow and smirks at you.

"Still not into me Karkitty?"

You blush and bury your face in his chest.

"Shut up and do it again" You mumble.

Aftermath.

The news of Karkat and Dave quickly spread and though many girls were heart-broken none were surprised. Even the math teacher didn't seem surprised when they walked in holding hands. Sollux, being the smart-ass he is went on for weeks teasing Karkat about it, but fully supported their relationship. The two were happy and that's all they cared about.

Notes: Thank you all soooo much for reading this! I had a lot of fun and was really pleased with all the positive reviews I got considering this is my first fan-fiction. I do plan to write more stories in the near future I just don't know what pairing to do, but I am open to suggestions! I really hoped you all liked this and if you want to follow me on Tumblr my Tumblr is .com

Thanks again!


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